I finished watching Secret Invasion yesterday and thought I would do something different today and put down some thoughts. Please be aware that if you don't agree, that's fine, this is what I thought.
Right, let's crack on.
So, Secret Invasion was a massive deal in the comics, spanning seven or eight months of crossovers, including various Marvel stalwarts such as the X - Men, The Avengers and Fantastic Four amongst a cavalcade of others.
Now we have the television series loosely (so loose you can see the wind flapping at the corners, and if somebody doesn't get there quick to peg it down it might just fly off!), based on that story, and hopefully, along with Antman and The Guardians of the Galaxy, ushering in Marvel's phase 5.
Well, I 'm sorry folks, if this is a sign of what's to come, pass me a blanket and wake me up when it's over.
As we know, Antman is the lowest grossing sequel in the Marvel universe, and thank goodness, Guardians of the Galaxy was able to swoop in and save the day. Well how does that transfer to the television aspect of the Multi format behemoth. Well, if Secret Invasion is anything to go by, let's hope Loki can spread a bit of mirth. Yep, unfortunately for me, Secret Invasion was a flop, and not even the living cool that is Samuel L. Jackson could save its sorry ass.
The story picks up thirty years (or four if you are living in the real world) after the events of Captain Marvel which saw Nick Fury offer the open hand of friendship to the shapeshifting Skrulls to take up residence on this ole blue planet. Fast forward to the present day and the Skrulls, whilst living amongst us are also living in the inhabitable irradiated parts of earth where no one could survive. And let me tell you they are pissed! So pissed they have thought sod it! Let's make Earth our own.
Enter stage left a broken and disgruntled Nick Fury to save the day, beaming down from an unknown location in space - and he's not happy!
After the snap, the blip, or whatever they chuffin call it, you know the thing where Thanos got all funky on the universe, clicks his fingers and hey presto your wish is my command and subsequently half the universe disappears and then gets put back to rights again by Marty McFly in back to the Future four, he's a bit pissed off.
All Fury wants to do is sit brooding in space where no one can hear you brood. Except, he can't! Pissed off at having his brooding interrupted, he half asses it back down to earth, to get kidnapped by Olivia Coleman, reprising her role as the Queen (except with added sociopath) and subsequently finds out from Talos trouble is afoot. The not so happy Skrulls have decided enough is enough. Nick Fury hasn't delivered on the promises that he made in the past and life is shit. Well, they aren't happy and have subsequently mounted an invasion to take out all the leaders and take the planet for themselves.
We immediately get the picture that this is going to be a darker outing for Marvel than usual, mainly coz they forget to switch the lights on through most of episode one and also coz Ben Mendehlson, as Talos, tells us it is in his most gravelly Tom Waits voice. I mean, that spells doom! Dunnit?
Oh, and then there's the fact that Emilia Clarke looks serious, and I mean really, painfully serious (or she could equally be suffering from a bad bout of constipation) all the way through each episode.
On top of that, this is going to have serious ramifications for the Marvel universe. We don't know how much, but it is coz they tell us, and tell us, and then tell you again just in case you forgot.
I'm sorry, Secret Invasion was ultimately, well, dull really. I mean Nick Fury spends most of his time grouching his way through the story, looking fed up! I' m not sure if that was due to the situation or the fact that he had to be dragged through six episodes of this tosh and was hoping he would get to episode six really quick so it could all be over and he could go back to his brooding.
Then there's the bad guy! What's is name? Gravalax! Urrrm no, that's not right is it? Isn't that some sort of cured fish? Urrrm, I'm sorry, I can't remember his name! Anyways, he was forgettable, so forgettable that I can't even remember his name. At least he could have shouted 'I am Groot' at some point to relieve the boredom. That would have been good!
By the time I had got to episode six I was thinking I know that this is supposed to be serious, but ultimately, do I care?
I think we can guess the answer to that can't we?
However, whilst watching the show I did find a humorous sideline of seeing how much the North of England can double up as locations in 'evil' Russia such as the Halifax Piece Hall at the end of episode 1, or Leeds to emulate Moscow, and then there's some bits in Huddersfield. At least they picked a place down south for the irradiated headquarters of the Skrulls to give a bit of respite.
Like I said earlier, let's hope Tom Hiddlestone can come in and save the day when Loki is released in October. Maybe he can get Nick Fury to turn that frown upside down.